t minus 5 days 23 hours and 59 minutes til the big day...

i wonder why they say "t minus".

when i did plays in high school we called the week of the show "hell week", which is kind of what this kind of reminds me of....scrambling to get everything together so it's just so, but not so much hell...maybe we should rename it "carrrraaaazzzy week". ha. that was dumb.

i've cried a lot...mostly because i'm gonna miss my family sooo soo much. but, really, i'm not gonna miss them like i'm moving to alaska or something (because i'm moving a mile away)...deep down i know it's because they mean more to me than they know. well...they know now. it's very strange to think that when i wake up on christmas, my brother won't be jumping on my bed yelling "time to open the presents!!!" and my mom yelling at us every sunday morning before church "are you up?" and then hauling ass so we won't hear the dreaded car horn. anyway...the important thing is to get all that crying stuff out of the way so i can focus on marrying the man i love so much.

usually the times when i'm crying, i'm not really crying for me. my mom always tells me that i get too emotionally invested in other people's feelings. i'll cry for you and with you if you're sad. i'll be truly angry and upset with you if you're angry and upset. i'll even hunt whoever got you that mad down and beat them up. i will jump up and down and smile with you when you're happy. basically, i'm super empathetic. but you know what? i can't help it. i just love everyone too much!